上海宏润博源学校CAS时间，哲学硕士、治愈师——吴俏女士来到我们学校，开设了主题为“高中生的爱情心理探索——少男少女们如何把握好相处之道”的一堂讲座，以帮助同学们认识自己，了解自己的情绪，把握好交往边界。

At the CAS session on Monday afternoon, Ms. Wu qiao, a Mphil and a psychotherapist, visited our school and gave our students a lecture, which aimed to guide them to recognize and reflect on their sexual feelings through some interactive activities and show them how to handle those feelings, i.e. the right ways to get along with that person and the boundaries to keep.

一开场，吴俏女士就抛出了三个问题，打开同学们的思维：“怎么知道自己喜欢上谁了?”“怎么决定要不要跟对方交往?”“什么情况下会决定跟对方结婚?”同学们的回答很有个性。来自11级1班的崔同学说，如果喜欢一个人，就会格外的关注她，想到她时就会小鹿乱撞;来自11年级3班的廖同学觉得，确定自己是不是真的喜欢他，喜欢到什么程度，并且自己不会受到伤害，才会决定交往;预备年级的孔同学认为，有了稳定的工作，并达到了法定的年龄限定，才可以考虑结婚。

First of all, Ms. Wu raised 3 questions: “How do you know that you have fallen in love with someone? ”, “How should you decide whether to keep dating him or her?” and “ Under what kind of circumstances will you decide to marry him or her?” Students gave some individualized answers to theses questions. Alex Cui from HR 11.1 said that if he liked a girl, he would pay extra attention to her, and that on thinking of her, his heart would skip a beat. Lynn Liao from HR 11.3 decided that she wouldn’t date with the boy until she knew for sure whether she really liked him or not, how much she liked him, and was convinced that she wouldn’t get hurt by him. Michael Kong from Pre Grade said that not until he had a stable job and reach the legal age for marriage would he consider marrying someone.

吴俏老师讲述了自己的人生故事，她建议我们做生活的主动者，清楚地认识自己，考虑自己的人生，选择自己的爱情和人生方式。主动能减少后悔的可能性，而被动就少了为自己负责任的机会，多了逃跑的借口。

By sharing with us her own life story, Ms Wu suggested that we should be the master of our own life, clearly know who we are, think about our own life, and choose our own way to love and live. She explained that if we took the initiative, we probably would regret less; however, if we acted in a passive way, we would tend to take fewer responsibilities but make more excuses for being a slacker.

会场上，同学们屏息静气。有同学发言，座席上就如一阵风扫过，同学们的头齐刷刷转向那人，有的座席上还发出掩饰不住的笑声，同学们的情绪被调动起来，真正的是聚精会神啊!

Inside the auditorium, the audience held their breath. All heads were turned to a speaker like a gust of wind swept across the seats. Some students could not help laughing. Their interest was so much aroused that they became absorbed in the lecture.

第二部分是“色彩图卡心理小测验”，不同的图卡代表了我们在爱情中做选择时会重视什么。“权杖”代表品格、道德、待人处事是否相似;“宝剑”代表兴趣、喜好、有没有共同话题;“圣杯”代表感觉舒服、安全、被照顾、在一起开心、温柔体贴;“钱币”代表着外貌、成绩、家世背景、是不是很大方。

During the second part of the lecture, Ms Wu showed us a “ psychological quiz” by using colorful cards. Different cards represent what we value most when choosing your loved ones. The “Scepter” stands for character, morality, and similarity in dealing with people and things; the “Sword” symbolizes interest, preference, and common ground; the “Holy Grail” epitomizes the feeling of comfort, safety, being cared for and happy together, gentleness and thoughtfulness; and the “coin” represents appearance, achievement, family background, and generosity.

同学们也对自己注重的元素做出了选择。11年级2班的黄同学选择“圣杯”，因为他更注重两个人心与心的连接;同样是11年级2班的徐同学选择“钱币”，因为他想要迎娶白富美，走上人生巅峰，并且为之努力;来自10年级的俞同学选择“权杖”，他表示素质、道德、家庭教养是做人的根本。

Students also chose the aspects that they valued most. Henry Huang from HR 11.1 chose the “Holy Grail” because he valued the connection of two souls. Tom Xu from the same HR class chose the “coin” because he desired to marry a fair-skinned, rich and beautiful girl, and work hard for his life goal; Ting Yu from HR 10.4 chose the “Scepter” because he considered one’s quality,morality and family upbringing as the first and foremost principle to stick to as we behave ourselves.

吴俏女士说，“选择”没有对错之分。重要的是审视初心，也要认识到未来的某一天自己或者喜欢的对象都会有所改变，要审视这些改变，主动且慎重地作出选择。

吴俏女士的话在耳边响着，让我们明白选择爱情与选择人生紧密相连，看重自己，把握好相处的边界，让生命每个阶段都绽放美好。

Ms Wu told us that there was nothing wrong with which choices you would make, but what matters was that we need to keep our original intention in mind. Some day we or our loved ones will change, and we need to examine such changes and take the initiative to make our own choices.

Ms Wu’s remarks rang a bell, making us realize that the choice of our loved ones is closely related to the choice of our way of life. Think highly of ourselves and we will live a wonderful life.

高中的少年少女之间相互好奇，产生好感是再正常不过的事情;不过，学校和家长需要合力引导同学们把握好相处的界限，为孩子们的成长护航。吴俏女士的讲座让孩子们去思考，去审视自己的情绪和想法，为学校一系列相关讲座做了很好的开场。

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